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Lottery Gambling

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Early on, the lottery gang realized that lottery players are nothing but a flock of sheep, easy marks to be fleeced again and again. Bad enough that a pitifully small amount of lottery profits are allocated for prizes, but when some schmuck holding a winning ticket doesn't redeem it—the ticket expires a year from purchase—the state claims that it "recycles" the unclaimed prize "into the prize pool," which is total bullshit.

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A $ 1 3.3-million-dollar winning Lotto ticket was purchased on June 3, 1996 and expired on the following June 3, 1997. Did the Lottery boys in Albany start off the next week's Lotto jackpot with the unclaimed $1 3.3 million, or with any of the $46.6 million in unclaimed prize money from Take Five, Pick 10, Quick-Draw, and all the multifarious scratch-off games? You bet your sweet ass they didn't!

Would you believe that, as the New York Daily News reported, a mind-boggling $59,900,000 in Lottery prize winnings went unclaimed in the year i997 alone?

Lottery players in general are proven losers, but especially those who blunder into buying a winning ticket and then don't even bother to check the numbers to see if they won!

It has been said that some people really don't want to win. When I see that almost $60 million was incredibly ceded back to the Lottery cabal by these born losers, I tend to agree.

The Spaniard who had a winning Lottery ticket for a January 1998 drawing can be forgiven for not cashing it. The unfortunate fellow died prior to the drawing and was buried along with the winning ticket in his pocket. The Associated Press news story didn't say whether or not his grieving relatives later dug up the corpse to retrieve the ticket.

Like your local Chinese laundry man says: no tickee, no washee. Same goes for New York State. The Associated Press reported on August 8, 1998 that Governor Pataki vetoed a bill that would have merely given a Long Island cab driver a hearing on his claim that believed them, the Daily News believed them, and probably even the lottery officials believed them, regretfully the officials gave their version of "No tickee, No washee": If you don't present the ticket you don't collect, period.

To repeat, if you're silly enough to waste your money on a lottery ticket, at least have enough brain matter to hang on to it and check it for a winner.

As dumb as lottery players are, in my estimation horse players are even dumber. Years ago I came to the realization that horses are smarter than people. After all, I've never heard of a horse that bet on a man. Have you?

The racetracks take an unconscionable percentage of dough out of the betting pool, but compared to OTB, they're benevolent. Off-Track Betting slices the pie even thinner.

And, like the lottery fools who don't bother to cash their winning tickets, some pony players piss away their winnings also by not cashing in. Since 1990, a staggering $70 million in horse bets has gone unclaimed. On September 13, 1998, the New York Post noted that $8 million had gone unclaimed in 1998 alone. The money just galloped out of the bettors' pockets and into the New York State treasury.

The stupidity of OTB players is exemplified by the player who bets there, then doesn't wait around to watch the race. When he opens his newspaper the next day and doesn't see his horse in the money, he throws away his ticket. What he forgets is the possibility that his nag was scratched, and didn't run at all. In that case, he is entitled to a full refund.

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